Cheers! It’s Our 10th Year Wedding Anniversary Today!

Here’s a collection of our photos put into slideshow during our engagement, wedding, during our early years together when I was still in the Philippines, and skipped to our 5th until the 9th year anniversary… I couldn’t find the first-fourth anniversary photos so, I apologize.

This with matching music of my choice for I believe, “Angels Brought Me Here” told my story and it suits how I feel towards my husband from the very beginning up to this day! Hope you all will enjoy the slideshow. Thanks for viewing!

 As we celebrate our wedding anniversary today, I am also celebrating silently for the passing of my father, Elson. Three years ago today, he rested peacefully and joined with Jesus in Heaven. ‘Pa, wherever you are, I hope you are happy and know I missed you so very very much and wishing you were still here with us….

 

 

#TBT: Ten Years Ago

Who would have thought that we could reach ten years of our relationship knowing that we came from two different worlds yet we get along very well despite of imperfections we have. This photo is my entry for Throwback Thursday on Facebook. I did not realize that it has been over ten years since me and my husband met until I saw this photo. This was taken during his first visit to the Philippines to see me 2004. With him is my then 4 years old sister.

This was also the day I turned 21 and the day he got on his knees to propose for marriage. I will never forget that day in my life. It was so significant and my first momentous event ever took place in my life. We will be celebrating our ten years of marriage on October. I am excited, I got a lot of unspoken words I need to write so that he will be able to know my thoughts and how I feel towards about our years of togetherness for a decade!

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A Courageous Woman

I hear stories of women featured on the news or on t.v shows who are in abusive relationships, how they deal with it for years, the pain and sufferings in the hands of their “supposed-to-be” husbands. Most stories were revealed that only very few of these women were able to get out of the unhealthy marriage or relationships they’re in. I somehow don’t understand that why it is hard to get out.

Anyway, speaking of which, I know someone in person and in real life who I say is brave and courageous enough to do what is right. She is also a Filipina and got married to a white man not even a year ago and they’re already living apart. There is a big problem with the man that made her leave him, hopefully for good.

I commend her for doing such thing. From the beginning all she had to endure is the pain and troubles that her husband caused her. Before they got married, I told her to make a really wise decision whether she’d marry him or not that she was well aware of  the problem that seemed to be no cure. She married him anyway and for months she she suffered (emotionally battered) and just after the New Year, she left him. I am in no position to disclose the details as to why they separated. All I know is that SHE HAS DONE the right thing for her and his own good. She deserves someone better, she deserves to be happy, respected and loved. Eventually she’ll find that peace and good life every woman is praying!

My Miracle, You’re the Answer to My Prayer

“The poorest man of all men is not a man without a cent but a man without a dream.”

Like any ordinary girl, I have dreams and ambitions. Since I was a kid I dreamt of marrying an American man. I am very much attracted to their physical appearance and the thought that mixed race babies are appealing to me. I have always promised myself to marry one someday.

During my third and fourth years in high school, I started seeing tons of US Navies and Marines in our city. I was too young and naive at the time that I even cut classes just to see them. Most of these men were at the Balikatan Exercises in Luzon, a joint military exercises between the Americans and the Filipino soldiers during former President Estrada’s term. My friends and I went to where their ship  docked (Ibo, Lapu-lapu City) to see them. We made friends with a few and it was indeed a great experience to have at least known some foreign men in them. As determined as I was to make it possible for me to communicate with the man in my dreams, I learned the internet.I started exchanging e-mails when I was 17, met a few in person.

At age 18, I had my first American boyfriend from Arkansas. I was extremely happy then because he was my type. Boy, he was very attractive with his blond hair and blue eyes. He went to visit me in my hometown and finally met him in person. It didn’t work for us though because we broke up after 5 months. I was devastated. He broke up with me for no apparent reason at all. I tried reaching him on the phone several times at first but all I got was his answering machine. Later on, he spoke to me but in a cold manner. I couldn’t believe what he did to me. It took a while for me to recover from that heart ache. I had moved on anyway.

Months later I met another guy online who was from California. He had the same physical attributes as the former guy. Oh my, I can’t believe I easily fall for the same looks. For the second time around, I got all disappointed again as the guy came to meet two other ladies besides me. I thought for sure we have been serious to each other. I had been expecting too much all along. Not only that I saw other two girls but he had been window shopping for more. That was a shame. I was all embarrassed I couldn’t stand it, I had to run out of the airport where I went to fetch him. He was sorry and begged for me to marry him. I didn’t get fooled by his drama and ended everything between us.

I didn’t give up and moved on to another hope of meeting someone I deserve. I met another one who was from Florida. He was all busy with his business so did with his child in his previous marriage. He had the chance to tour Europe and never to see me. It was all over for us after a year of waiting.

I’ve been hurt a few times and along the way it made me even pickier. I had almost found anything wrong in a person just to make sure I will end up with someone truthful to me. In just a little mistake such as misspelling of certain words put me off so easily from the guy.

It was in the middle of Feb.2004 on Cherry Blossoms, I was checking my account to see who sent me a message. There were few mails and Sandy was one of them who wrote me. He first said hi along with all other information about him. I looked at his pictures posted and oh, he is so cute! And so I got back to his mail and replied with just very short note telling that he is cute and that I want to get to know more about him. That’s all it. The following day, he sent his quick reply again but I just ignored it, never took the time to reply him back because I was not interested with him.

Meantime, I myself was busy chatting and e-mailing with others except him. I was still trying hard to look for a possible mate who can bring me to the aisle. There came a time, it was 2 weeks after he sent me his first mail actually when I checked my mails and it was empty. I returned to his dormant mail which I never tried to response and read it again. I did reply to it and gave my Yahoo ID so we get to chat. Yes, for the first time we chatted. I could tell the way he hurl his words to me that he is the gentleman type, soft spoken and polite. But still I’m not interested with him because I thought “he’s too good-looking for me” and enough for cute men, they only play with your heart.

I asked him money with the intention of pushing him away and never wanting to chat with me again because I know for a fact once you ask money from foreigners they will never get back to you and get turned off for they might think that you’re only up to it. This man is different. He never got discouraged instead he sent me $100 the following day. I really was surprised once informed by the money transfer office that I got something from him. So I got the money and thanked him with a promise to myself that I will only focus on him.

After four months of exchanging e-mails, chats and phone calls he decided to see me. It was in time for my 21st birthday when he proposed to me telling my father, “Elson, I came across a thousand miles to marry Anne because I’m in love with her”. Even before he turned to me and declared his intention, I got teary-eyed already.

The moment, he knelt down holding the engagement ring while the other hand holding my hand asking, “Anne, will you marry me?” I got speechless. Where did my voice go? Could it be that my tongue shrunk? Now crying even more and finally I was able to respond, “Yes, I will marry you, Sandy” We got formally engaged on my 21st birthday and for me it was already a big dream come true.

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… there is more to this photo that meets the eye of my ordinary readers, for me it was so special for it was the beginning of my quest towards building a family of my own….

Another 4 months had passed and he visited me for the second time for our big day — the wedding. It was I who exerted much effort to make our wedding beautiful and memorable to all who witness and thank goodness, it went well.

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….the day he officially gave his name to me, October 16,2004 at Bellavista Hotel Rooftop…
 

Finally, I got my visa to come and be united with him in the states after a painstaking 9 months of waiting for the whole process to be done. Now I am so much happier. After all those thunderstorms in my life, I was able to overcome it all and thank God for the strength He had given me. Thanks to Him for He was always being there for me!

P.S WE ARE NOW BLESSED WITH TWO BEAUTIFUL DAUGHTERS NAMED Jadyn and Megan. As for our marriage, we are celebrating ten years  today, October 16,2014 (Yehheyy cheers to that) happy and fulfilled as a wife, as a woman and as a mother!

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… Jadyn is 5 and 1/2 years old and Megan is 25 months old when this picture was taken…

Life’s lesson I’ve learnt is that, it only takes courage and determination to achieve the hardest goal you’ve ever thought you have in your life. I remember my family and friends told me “I am too ambitious to dream of marrying an American”. I had this saying before, By hook or by crook, whatever happens I will marry the man of my dreams”. I could say that I am stronger now. I am proud of my past. If not because of it, I would not be here right now living happily with my wonderful husband and daughters. I hope this will serve as inspiration to those who lost hope finding their love.

P.S. You see, I felt I was in a hurry finding love but it took me almost 4 years finding the right one. I was a girl who was into foreigners but I was able to preserve myself for the man I marry. Albeit meeting tons of Western men, I take pride of myself that my husband was the only man I slept with. I have always been a “conservative” type of woman who believes a woman should only submit her body to the man right after marriage. I did not even sleep with him in the hotel room during his first visit. I would always come home every night to my parents’ house for I know they were waiting on me…

To my mother in-law whom I have not met in person, hope you read this. UNLESS YOU KNOW MY STORY, DON’T JUDGE ME.

Enough blah blah, duh but anyways… CHEERS TO BOTH OF US, IT’S OUR 10TH YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!!!

Here’s us today, ten years later!
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The Highest Flattery I Received from my Spouse

I just subscribed to a Cosmopolitan magazine, I received two issues so far. I never thought this magazine could be this interesting because of their useful love, lust and sex tips/advice they provide to their readers. It is the only thing I am interested in, I am not into makeup or beauty products so I just skip the pages, lol.

I have been married for soon 9 years and I can say, I am happy with the man I’m with for this long. Not only we do have something special but also I say it, as a woman that we do have a good sex life. The fire is still burning after all these years. I am glad I have a husband who is healthy and keeps up with me although he is an older guy.

Anyway, looking at the magazine’s cover, you can tell how interested I am to learning new sex moves or anything that is beneficial to my marriage. I am married but that doesn’t mean I know everything already. I am open to learning new things when given a chance and through reading I gain new ideas.

Nothing is more heart-melting than receiving the highest flattery from my better half saying I am “so much better than a porn star”. And he said that right after our intimate moment together, awss! Haba ng hair ko day! After hearing those words I am confident being with him more than ever and will continue to please him as long as we’re together.

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HEAR WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN

It has been shared on Facebook a thousand times and I am sharing it here too so my dear readers can get an insight as to why men would stay or not. Enjoy!

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t “be friends”. A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.

Don’t settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who have a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within. Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are. Even if he has has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending… Compromise is two way street. You need time to heal between relationships. There is nothing cute about baggage… Deal with your issues before pursuing a new
relationship. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you. A relationship consists of two WHOLE
individuals. Look for someone complimentary…
not supplementary.

Dating is fun… Even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes… When a man always know where you are, and you’re always readily available to him ~ he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother’s house. Never co-sign for a man. Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil says… You should know that: You’re the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he’ll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he’s not the only one. They’re all watching you, so you have a lot of choices. Make the right one. Ladies take care of your own hearts… ❤

Family Isn’t Always Blood

I so agree with the statement below. Family isn’t always blood but people  that touched your heart the most, people who show concern to you and care for you are family.

Second photo is of our first born and her grandma Jean. Jean is not related to us by blood but she serves/stands as our children’s grandma for she accepted them/us as her own family and so do we. You might ask me, where their real grandma is? Well, that could be a one million dollar question our children would have to ask us someday.

The fact is, they have not known or met their American grandma (my husband’s mother) for I have been judged since the beginning of my relationship with her son so we kept her out of our lives. She also denies her two grandchildren because I am a foreigner and she cannot accept that her son is happy with a Filipina.

It is just so awful how someone could be so judgmental without even knowing the person first. Well, it is her loss anyway, not ours. She missed the opportunities how it is to live having grand kids around being showered with tons of love and kisses.

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‎10 Ways To Add Sizzle To Your Love Life

A great article I snagged shared in one of friends’ wall.

1. Go on date nights.
“Couples should never stop courting,” says Lou Paget, a sex educator and author of Hot Mamas. Going on dates with your significant other can help reignite the spark and bring back joy to the relationship.
Pick a time and a venue, and consider it a treat for the two of you. Bring back the lust by revisiting spots you went to on your earlier dates. Make sure you take the time and dress up for your date. Nothing like seeing you all spruced up to make him feel wanted and naturally attracted to you. Also, leave the mobile phones out of your date nights (or at least stop constantly checking it); everything else can wait! “The key is to pay attention to your mate,” says Paget.

This is great but having two kids around this date seems impossible for us since we don’t have anybody to look after them for a while we are out for a date. Also we have had our first dates during courting stage in the Philippines and as much as I wanted to go back to the places where we went, that is another big impossible to do because it costs a lot of money, lol.

2. Wear his cologne.
You love how he smells, so why shouldn’t you be treated to that masculine scent all day long? Research shows that smelling your man is actually an aphrodisiac. According to researchers at the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction, the scent of a man’s cologne can significantly increase a woman’s arousal. “[Smelling your man’s cologne] will certainly help put you in the mood,” says Cynthia Graham, Ph.D., one of the researchers.
So the next time you’re missing your man or if he is away for a business trip, dab a little of his favorite scent behind your ears. Chances are, you’ll be ready to pounce on him the minute he walks through the door.

I agree with this 100%. While we were still waiting for my visa to be done, we would be separated from each other for months so what I did is ask him of his shirt that he wore with his smell in it and  keep it with me every night…that somehow helped me a bit and made me want him more and more!

3. Keep the TV out of your relationship.
You’ve probably heard this many times, but we feel it still needs to be reinforced in all relationships: limit your TV time as a couple. Here’s why: A research from Purdue University reveals that people who chat while the TV is blaring look at their companions 36 percent less often than they do when it’s turned off. As result, your alone time with your partner is a less satisfying (and definitely less intimate). “With the set turned off, you’ll create more opportunities for conversation and be able to focus on your loved one as you talk,” says study author Glenn Sparks.

We do have our t.v/movie time but we also find time to just talk about things… as I’ve said in number one, we do have kids and finding that “couple time” nowadays is kind of difficult.

4. Laugh together.
According to a study in the journal Motivation and Emotion, couples who share a laugh were more satisfied with their relationships than those who didn’t. And when you are more satisfied with your relationship, chances are your sex life will also be more amazing. Explains Doris Bazzini, lead author of the study: “Laughing together builds a supply of good memories. You’ll call on it later when times get tough.”

Hmmmmmmmmm we still laugh together but rarely, lol…

5. Get rid of a negative body image.
Nobody wants to get intimate if they think they’re fat/ugly/undesirable/insert negative body image here. Many times, being negative about how you look can be a downer for any relationship. The key here? The faster you get rid of all that negative body image, the better it will be for your sex life. Laura Berman, author of Real Women, Real Sex, explains that your partner won’t see your areas as problem areas until you point them out. So make sure you stop putting yourself down in front of your partner and just enjoy his admiration for your body instead!
To take it a step further, why not indulge him by dressing the part? Kick off your baggy T-shirt and unshapely pants; instead, start wearing clothes that are flattering to your body! It won’t hurt to invest in a pair of lacy underwear to help you feel sexy underneath.

I am comfortable in my own skin. I mean I still consider myself skinny (towering a height of 5’1″ and 98 lbs.) after having two children although I admit my belly is kind of soft and flabby now. Well, in fairness he still says I look beautiful (in rare occasions) when I am dressed nicely for an important day out… most of the time though I am at home taking care of the kids and well… I look just ahhhhhhhhhhh plain housewife that doesn’t care what clothes I wear or comb my hair….

6. Set the mood in the bedroom.
Venue plays a part when it comes to a great sex life. So an overly cramped, messy and dull bedroom can fizzle out whatever desire you both have for sex. “If you can do anything to transform your bedroom into something new and different, that can make a big difference,” advises sex therapist Louanne Cole Weston.
You don’t have to give your bedroom an overhaul to achieve this. Do small things like light up candles at night or invest in mood lighting to set a romantic vibe, getting silk sheets (for that smooth sensation) and also removing the junk out of your room to create more space and peace within.

Arggsss! This is so hard to do especially the candle lighting thing because we do have very mobile kids here,  a 4 year-old and a little cruiser of 11 months old…. I wish to do this though when the kids are out of our house and on their own.

7. Go in for a hug.
Hugs can prove to be more than just comforting; it can also create a sense of connection and be a foolproof foreplay. Says Dr. Ian Kerner, sex and relationship counselor as well as author of She Comes First, “Studies show that a 20-second hug raises the level of the ‘cuddle-hormone’ oxytocin, which facilitates a sense of love and connection. It’s a way of bookending the day and entering the new chapter of the evening. Men need to be hugged three times as much as women to reach similar levels, so go for a full minute of hugging.”
The next time you see your guy, make sure you greet him with a nice long hug. Plus, being so close to you and touching your skin that way is a great way to get him wanting more.

Yes, we still manage to hug on his day off and when he comes home from work every afternoon. I think that’s the easiest thing to do with him and I am okay with just hugs without kissing.

8. Manage your stress.
The instant sex killer? Stress. Who has time to think about being intimate when you’re worried about everything else!
Be careful—letting stress take over your life will result in an unsatisfying relationship as well as sex life. Suggest Irwin Goldstein, MD, director of San Diego Sexual Medicine and editor in chief of The Journal of Sexual Medicine: “People are overworked and stressed. And they translate their overworked, stressed lives to a lousy sex life.”
Don’t want to fall into the rut of stress? Why not go away on a vacation with your partner. Being able to leave all that work behind will free up your mind to enjoy the time with your partner—whether out sight-seeing or in the hotel bedroom.

For me, we may be stressed in some ways but we don’t let it get in our sex life. If we feel like we are stressed then we skip a weekend without doing it then the next weekend will be more ooohhss and aaahhss, you know what I mean?

9. Eat your way to a better sex life.
Certain foods are known to help boost your sex life. So the next time you go grocery shopping, make sure you include these into your shopping basket:
Oysters and avocados. Both are high in dopamine, a neurotransmitter that triggers the part of our brain that recognizes reward and pleasure.
Fish. Contains Omega-3 fatty acids, which improve your cardiovascular health and increase dopamine.
Chili. Helps to kick-start your nervous system and gets the heart racing—perfect for after-dinner fun!
Almonds. Contain a high level of arginine, which helps to boost blood flow. Better blood flow means heightened sensitivity.

These are great foods that we usually eat except avocados because they are a bit expensive. Oysters I love the most but I can only eat them when we go out to a buffet restaurant. 

10. Stay in shape.
Physical activity can be a sure-fire way to keep things sizzling in the bedroom for a simple reason—the healthier you are, the better you look and the more confidence you’ll have in your body. Plus, it’ll help you enjoy sex even more. Says Sara Nasserzadeh, Ph.D. and co-author of The Orgasm Answer Guide, “Physical fitness absolutely affects the physical intensity and quality of sex.” Also, research shows that exercise can help increase blood flow and improve your orgasms. So go on, grab your partner for a run. You’ll enjoy the treat that comes after.

Oh I missed those times when we go to a high school track and run for an hour together. Things have changed here a bit and we’re busy so we might be running again someday. Also we do have an exercise machine waiting on us in the garage, once he’s done making the garage comfortable enough to do our exercise there then there is no reason for us to be out of shape anymore.

Perfect Pair Made In Heaven

Now I know why I shed so much tears before with my experiences with men. God knew how much I wanted for someone who will accept me for who I am, accepts me of my flaws and not try to change me. Thank You,Lord…thank You!

It is not everyday we meet people like that so when we do, we must embrace them, nourish and nurture them in our lives for when they are gone…they are gone forever!

In our marriage, I see no skin color, I see no age… instead…I see a love that is pure and real. A true companion that I can really count on during tough times… And most of all I see my future which I am living  right now… and I am certain this is forever.

20 Romantic Things to Do in Small Spaces

Some people love to do crazy yet sexy things together. Read all these cute things that you can do together in small places and tell me how crazy are you if you have done some of these.

1. Go through revolving doors together
2. Take a road trip in a VW “Love Bug”
3. Have silly pictures of the two of you taken in a photo booth
4. Join her in the dressing room while lingerie shopping
5. Make love in restroom aboard a plane in flight
6. Relax together in a Jacuzzi
7. Make love in a closet at a friend’s party
8. Sleep spoon-style in a single bed
9. Squeeze into phone booths together
10. Camp-out in a tent together
11. Make love in the back seat of a car
12. Travel in a train’s sleeper car
13. Attend movie theaters that have “loveseats”
14. Sit side-by-side in booths at little diners
15. Make love in an elevator
16. Go on vacation aboard an RV
17. Hold a picnic in a tree fort
18. Make love in the back of a limousine
19. Take a relaxing bubblebath together
20. Make love in a sleeping bag